Many Christians are quick in desiring to be “spiritually mature”, which we usually define in some sort of productive terms (eg how much we know or how much we do). But emotional immaturity in the church, or what Pete calls Emotionally Unhealthy spirituality, is one of the biggest problems we have today.
<aside> 🚶🏼♂️ It is impossible to be spiritually mature while being emotionally immature.
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When we pursue knowledge of God at the neglect of knowing ourselves, we not only hinder our own spiritual growth but are also inhibited from knowing God more fully. Even Augustine and Calvin believed knowledge of self was inseparable from knowledge of God.
How can you draw close to God when you are far from your own self? Grant, Lord, that I may know myself that I may know thee. — Augustine, Confessions 400 AD
Our wisdom… consists almost entirely of two parts: the knowledge of God and of ourselves. — Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion 1530 AD
In order to know our true selves, we must go back in order to go forward. We need to be honest about what experiences we’ve had in the past, learn, and recognize how they still affect us today. As we grow in discipleship to Jesus, we will soon find ourselves against the wall. The wall confronts our usual way of following Jesus, which is usually based on productivity, and this wall makes us stop to reset. If we are willing to let go of power and control, we find ourselves free to feel what is going on in our heart of hearts. This is where we recognize how we are truly doing, and as it is brought before God he meets us where we are at. Since God only deals in truth, this is where true transformative change occurs.
<aside> 🚶🏼♂️ Your greatest gift to the world is your true self living in union with God.
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As we begin to become more emotionally aware of ourselves, we can begin to “enlarge our soul” through grief and loss. We are able to sit with ourselves and others in hard times of suffering, loneliness, or despair. We are better able to recognize and accept our limits without succumbing to insecurities.
Practically, the disciplines that seem to help us reach a place of emotional maturity are the “unproductive” disciplines, such as regular prayer and sabbath. The Daily Office, popularized by St. Benedict, includes regular prayer throughout the day which is viewed as the “true work” of God. The ancient practice sabbath is an important rhythm that we regularly forsake in today’s modern productive age. Going beyond sabbath is the idea of the Rule of Life, which is analogized to a trellis that gives structure to a thriving vine. The Rule of Life is a set of rhythms intentionally established to help us love God and others from a place of rest and emotional stability.